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Whale Songs for Beginners

by Nathaniel T. Lesser

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1.
I've known you for quite some time. Just like love, well you left me blind. But we can't quit now, there's too much to do As the sun hangs low and the wind blows through Past the rusted swing-sets of un-mowed lawns, Through the drive-in movie screens left in tatters From the Baptist churches where they die reborn, To the barn where the hay's left stacked to its rafters And I've known you for quite sometime... There's a fat man buried in his grand piano There's the lost chess piece, there's the missing domino There's the tallest living man never using height to his advantage Who’s the first to admit but the last left standing And plastic flowers fade on their welcome mats Underneath goose down, my teeth still chatter And the old lady who sets poison for the mice and the rats Her door is open but greetings don't matter And I've known you for quite some time.
2.
Last night, I was walking with the Holy Ghost And woke up this morning in a dead man's clothes Was getting so tired of how this world spins No need to figure out the shape I'm in In the end, you're all by yourself and at the helm No longer imprisoned by the physical realm I've been walking such a long, long time Headed toward the white light to see what I can find Wrestled angels in my path Felt seduction; I just laughed Through my nightmares I've ignored Life's lost vessel is no more No I can't help it, I can't win This mortal coils caving in Lonely sailor, on leave from the sea Three sheets rattling in a steady breeze Lost forgiveness, climb the stairs Weary faces in despair, Second thoughts cross his mind But the monkey's close behind He can't help it/ He can't win He's losing this time...yeah. Last night, went walking with the Holy Ghost And woke up this morning in a dead man's clothes Was getting so tired of how this world spins No need to figure out the shape I'm in Burning in effigy all by myself No longer imprisoned by the physical realm
3.
Antidote 04:28
With one flat tire, a busted lip and this broken heart I veered into the breakdown lane and I rolled to a slow stop. Between the ecosystems and industrial parks, There's a steady hum when the nighttime comes to let you know that you're left in the dark... These are forgotten roads The ones with torn out payphones An unlit vacancy sign someone forgot to turn on. With a tire jack in my hand, I got the lay of the land, and one eye on the setting sun. It can be that involved, there's no riddle to solve, and if you try, it leaves you tired and numb In the final seconds my brains left scrambling to find the antidote And for a moment I think I found it, but then I don't I feel the hot wind on my back of oncoming cars This rusted lug nuts fused, it leave me less enthused as I start to fall apart A stream of obscenities in the cicadae drowns Makes this anger burn as it slowly turns to a new found quiet resolve And thank God I'm alone A thousand miles from home Off the grid for a while, my whereabouts unknown. With a tire jack in my hand, I got the lay of the land, and one eye on the setting sun. It can be that involved, there's no riddle to solve, and if you try, it leaves you tired and numb My cards face up on the table and I've doubled down on hope For a moment I think I found it but then I don't With a tire jack in my hand, I got the lay of the land, and one eye on the setting sun. It can be that involved, there's no riddle to solve, and if you try, it leaves you tired and numb If the pendulum swings back and forth then the noose is round my throat And for a moment I hope I'll find out but then I won't And in the final seconds my brain's left scrambling to find the antidote For a moment I think I'll find it but then I don't
4.
I wonder how you ever found me, as the weeds grew in all around me I was just about to give it up and fall back into the fray But it was like you already knew me You could see and see through me Now you've gone and pulled me up and I'm never going to be the same Still lots of people they can stare at an empty page, And tell you that there's nothing left to save With no sign of worry in their furrowed brow Still you and I have always been, another prayer that's left out on a wing And if takes a cold day in hell, I'd want to spend it with you How can you ever question our love? How can it pull us up to the light, to take a different view? And what you thought was so spoiled and dried up, so rotten and vile is the sweetest thing we knew You think about how all this transpired How did we both leap out from the fire that burned us from within? And underneath that charred frame of the phoenix, the one that use to fly around in between us, I see your silly grin Still lots of people they can stare at an empty page, And tell you that there's nothing left to save With no sign of worry in their furrowed brow Still you and I have always been, another prayer that's left out on a wing And if takes a cold day in hell, I'd want to spend it with you All this time I wasted, huddled in these dark places ends Still the seasons and the tides keep turning, there's something here inside so real, do you feel it pulling you in? Still lots of people they can stare at an empty page, And tell you that there's nothing left to save With no sign of worry in their furrowed brow Still you and I have always been, another prayer that's left out on a wing And if takes a cold day in hell, I'd want to spend it with you
5.
6.
Fort Gorges 06:57
Time tears down all defenses as these cracks begin to show, Why we hold on to the land we lost in our battles year ago. Feel the wharf rat scurry through you; tonight he sleeps in captain's quarters And your spiral staircase crumbles as these cannons face the water A fortress on an island in the middle of the bay Boats of tourist click as these vines grow thick where you pass your time away Can you feel the turning tide?/Will they ever light your fuse? A great protector of these rocky shores not just a cold and empty muse How long do we wait for what never comes? (We'll leave our ghost here when we're done) When the bombs explode will you fight or run? (Keep a steady watch upon the harbor) The boom of the cannons fill my ears (Keep a steady watch along the water) Somewhere the battles rage but you're not there This is solitary war we're fighting These walls were built up stone by stone not to engage the enemy Now your stone face stares out blankly through the low tides and raging seas Do you ever feel like crumbling just to leave this place behind? Not be a disregarded relic of such a sad and worried time. How long do we wait for what never comes? (We'll leave our ghost here when we're done) When the bombs explode will you fight or run? (Keep a steady watch upon the harbor) The boom of the cannons fill my ears (Keep a steady watch along the water) Somewhere the battles rage but you're not there This is solitary war we're fighting Another sunny Munjoy hillside morning 10 sailors lined up buried under ground. Next to the stevedore and the shanty whore Whose boot heels click on the cobblestone through town In time they lost track of their faces The wind and rain smoothed out the engraved stone Now their nameless souls float to parts unknown To the furthest shore, the furthest shore from home Are they sailing out to find you on this cold and mournful morning? Are the seagull's calls and the dark sea squalls trying to keep the spirits from their crossing? Now you can let down your defenses and leave this ghostly battle station Discharge the phantom guard in the grassy yard so he can take his soldier's pension There'll be no more dark and echoed halls to pace (Don't let us fall into the water) No granite walls to keep this misery in place (Don't let it fall into the harbor) Fire all your cannons with abandon (Don't let us fall into the water) I'd wave this white, torn, tattered flag half in relief, and half despair But no one's there
7.
Roots Remain 04:31
Loneliness is sometimes floating Haunts me like the melody As the violin plays through the shetyl, Where you once sat upon your father's knee We are sons of no known, brothers by name Orphaned in a world of misery Looking for what roots remain I've known you but you will not know me Dreams of you like the carrier pigeon Circling, waiting just to find The message tied with strings so tightly But written in a language that's not mine To the sons of no known, brothers by name Orphaned in a world of misery Looking for what roots remain I've known you but you will not know me The bride and groom are somehow floating, Love has loosened ties To their past, so sad and weary See them on the rise They're dancing in the sky As hair it thins and eyes grow weaker Younger in a different time When a Jewish boy's future looked much bleaker Forced to fight and first to die We were sons of no known, brothers by name Orphaned in a world of misery Looking for what roots remain I've known you but you will not know me The bride and groom are somehow floating, Love has loosened ties To their past, so sad and weary See them on the rise They're dancing in the sky I sing this song for those who pass around me My swirling doppelgängers in the sky Heritage was only just a whisper But today it is our battle cry For the sons of no known, brothers by name Orphaned in a world of misery Looking for what roots remain I've known you but you will not know me
8.
NSA in the land of the free Zombie minds in a tractor beam of technology Stay off the grid and keep your conscience hid Silent drones hovering in the sky Your lap top computer has an evil eye Let's quit while we're ahead Your phone is smart but your brain is dead But I want to live more authentically Cut the fiber optic cords and sail away on the sea I'll be out of town when they come for me For the Great Singularity I hope that you know this goes down upon your- Permanent Record The allegiance you swore to everyone who ignored your- Permanent Record, Permanent Record You can't draw the curtains your doors open wide When life's on display then there's nothing to hide And they will find out They know your whereabouts They're trailing you in your virtual space Your mind's in control of what your hand can't erase It's been said or done Every word you speak, every thought under the gun There's and agent who doesn't exist Taps into a file puts your name on a list Passed to a the bureaucrat who gets to decide What he'll allow and who he'll destroy I hope that you know this goes down upon your- Permanent Record The allegiance you swore to everyone who ignored your- Permanent Record, Permanent Record All the things that you said when you thought they couldn't hear you All the things that you did when you thought they couldn't see Have been placed in a file somewhere, deep within this warehouse And available to all for a nominal fee I hope that you know this goes down upon your- Permanent Record The allegiance you swore to everyone who ignored your- Permanent Record, Permanent Record

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released February 3, 2014

Written, Played and Recorded by N.T. Lesser

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Nathaniel T. Lesser Portland, Maine

N.T. has been writing and recording music since he was 12, when he would quietly sing and play into a handheld tape recorder like he was keeping a secret. Since then he has been sharing. The Portland Press Herald says, “Whale Songs for Beginners is a quirky, little record. As it happens, it’s also a good record, with a heartfelt earnestness that belies its DIY aesthetic.” Take a listen! ... more

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